Adventures in Angelsitting
by vampirekittyLP
Summary: As Dean finds out, babysitting an angel is tough work. Like trying to catch a hurricane with a butterfly net.. but harder.


**My second story. For anyone outside the UK, Asda is basically the British equivalent of wal-mart. XD Hope you like, and constructive criticism will be much appreciated :)**

**p.s I don't own supernatural :(**

Dean was sat at the motel table, eyes cast down and resting his head against his hand and looking down, trying to focus on a magazine. He hadn't done this for a while, putting his mental energy into something other than a case. It was made even more difficult by the fact that Castiel was pottering around the motel room, restless.

Sam was out getting them some hot food and beverages. He'd only been gone 15 minutes, but Dean was already at the end of his patience with Castiel inquiring about the nature of every enthralling item in the kitchen. There hadn't been conversation between them since Dean had snapped and told Cas that the oven was "A fiery portal to hell."

It was sarcastic, but Castiel seemed frightened into silence which made Dean feel slightly guilty. He did appreciate the few minutes of silence however... until he thought he smelt.. burning?

"I think I understand the purpose of this contraption." Castiel deadpanned.

Dean glanced up once, and then looked back down. Then it registered and he shot out of his chair. Castiel was bent over the toaster, his tie in one the racks.

Dean yanked Cas back by his trench coat, flapped a tea towel at the flaming toaster, and then turned around to evaluate the damage done to Cas. He was rooted to the spot, the bottom half his tie was badly singed and his face was surprised, like he'd been horribly betrayed by the toaster.

"I thought-"

Dean held up a hand to stop him. "Don't even say it." He went over to Castiel, pulled the burnt tie over his head, and threw it in the vague direction of the bin. But Cas without a tie looked plain wrong.

"Get in the car, we're gonna go get you a new tie."

They drove a few minutes till they came to some place called Asda. '"Part of the wal-mart family." It says. Can't be that bad right?' Dean said as they looked for a place to park. Castiel looked blank.

Dean shot him a glance, and smirked. "Oh, that's right. You've never been to a store before have you?"

Castiel stared straight ahead.

"You'll be fine Cas. Now get the hell out."

They found their way to the clothes aisle, Castiel taking his surrounds in through wide eyes.

"Just stick with me Cas, and you'll be fine.." He muttered.

Dean stopped at the tie rack and spun it around a few times, trying to find a good match.

He turned around a few minutes, holding up the closest match he could find, which was actually not a bad replacement.

"Okay, how about this one-"

Except Cas wasn't there. Dean was ready to hyperventilate, until he heard Castiel's voice call out behind him.

"Dean, what is this? It says that it is supportive and lifts you. I don't understand. It holds the same characteristics as you but it'.. very complex."

Dean turned, and Castiel was a few feet away, holding a bright red bra right up to his face.

Dean froze, and people were walking past giving them both odd accusatory looks and some old woman muttered, "Perverts."

"Cram it with walnuts, grandma." Dean replied, not missing a beat. He marched over to Cas, grabbed the offending item and quickly hung it back up, scolding Castiel. "I told you not to objectify me honey, it drives me nuts."

Castiel looked clueless, and Dean marched off avoiding the eyes of every shopper. Once around the corner, he lost his cool and suddenly felt very dirty, like he should wash his mind with bleach. Instead, he rushed towards the one thing that would be guaranteed to improve his mood.

Once Dean had found some satisfactory pie, he had to find Cas again. He'd recently taught Cas how to use a phone, so he didn't pop up in public places using his angel mojo. He dialled, and waited.

"Hello, this is a human speaking. Would you like to sell me something?"

"It's me."

"I'm sorry, who?"

"Cas, I'm the only contact in your phone."

"Well Dean, it might have been a cold caller." Dean ignored how excited Castiel sounded about the prospect.

"Cas, where are you?"

"I am in the.. makeup section. It really is quite fascinating. "

Dean hung up and cussed at no one in particular. He found his way awkwardly over to the makeup aisle - which he hadn't realised existed before now- mumbling all the way. Something about keeping angels on a leash. Castiel was still there, staring transfixed at a poster advertising the latest and greatest whore paint.

After a few seconds of silence, Castiel turned his gaze to Dean.

"Dean," he began seriously.

His face was so serious, Dean instantly became worried. "What? Is there a demon here?" He said in a low voice, instinctively reaching for his gun.

"..do you curl your eyelashes?"

"OH FOR THE LOVE OF-"

"It says here that this new mascara will curl as well as lengthen so that-"

"CAN IT, FEATHERS." Dean grabbed Castiel's trench coat sleeve and dragged him along to the counter to pay. He dumped their items at the till and waited to be served, tense and not trusting himself to speak.

When it was their turn, the woman at the till smiled widely when she saw the both of them. Dean was instantly suspicious - the only people that were happy to see them these days were demons. Then she gestured to the both of them and exclaimed cheerfully, "Well aren't you two just the _cutest_ couple!"

It was then that Dean realised he was still holding on to Castiel's arm. His pulled it back like it had been burned, and tried to regain his masculinity. He didn't bother correcting the cashier, he was pretty sure she wouldn't believe them anyway. Plus, Castiel's glowing smile in response didn't help much.

He just grabbed their stuff and walked out without a glance back. Once they were sitting back in the car, Castiel sighed and looked back out of the window.

"That was enjoyable Dean, we should do this more often."

Dean nearly banged his head against the steering wheel.

When they eventually got back to the motel room Sam was inside, food set at the table, and he was halfway through a salad.

"Where have you guys- Castiel, are you wearing makeup?"

"What the hell Sam, are you nuts? I told you eating salad was-"

But then Dean's gaze swiftly joined Sam's and both brothers looked intently at the angel, and there were a few moments of very awkward silence.

Then Cas spoke, his face turning red. "I only wanted curvaceous eyelashes like Dean's."

Sam nearly choked on his salad, not even trying to compose himself. Dean just rolled his eyes and threw himself face down onto his bed.


End file.
